Monday, February 9, 2015

I Just Need the Occasional Emoji

Ok, I am going to start by admitting something.
I am totally insecure.
Like, 9th grader in braces (with headgear) insecure.

As an extrovert by nature who has moments of acute introversion (usually brought on by the arguing or demands of five children who are with me I have enjoyed the evolution of the text message.

I remember when texting first became "a thing."  I was all, "Pffft.  That is silly.  Why would someone go through all the trouble of typing on their phone when they can just call real quick and have a conversation?   It'll never last."

cell phone, flip phone, texting, emoji, punctuation, grammar, spelling

Fast forward 15 years and, well, texting is a way of life.  It is the surreptitious way of staying in touch with my other mama friends while my kids are doing their grammar after our busy homeschooling days.  Ahem.

Back to my point.

When I text, it is usually with great emotion.  Exclamation points are a favorite, followed closely by the emoji.  And I always, always punctuate.

(Hello, my name is Jeanine and I am a grammar nerd.)

So here is my problem:
I have awesome friends.  Friends who I can call day or night to vent, celebrate, and otherwise survive this jungle called motherhood.  But a few of my friends, apparently, don't understand the emotional consequence in my life of leaving out punctuation.

For instance:

I text my girlfriend a question:
Hey!  Hope you are having a great day!  Want to meet up for coffee later?

Her response?
sorry cant today

In which my imagination goes crazy..."She is made at me.  Have I offended her?  Was my kid mean to her kid?  Is our friendship on the rocks?  Oh no, she most certainly has moved on to another friend and I am ditched!"

Or maybe it is a conversation like this.  A friend texts me a question...
do you know janes phone #

I swallow my irritation at the improper capitalization and punctuation and answer:
Sure!  It is 555-667-1234.

Her response?

THX?  What the heck?  My inner 9th grader goes berserk..."Oh no, she thinks I am annoying.  She wanted to get that conversation over as quickly as humanly possible.  She needed information but did NOT want to be engaged beyond that.  Great.  She hates me."

Looney tunes, folks.  I am a case study, for sure.

I have TRIED to be a concise, emotionless texter but I can't!  I just can't!  I need emotion, people!  I can't handle bland, unfeeling messages!  And I certainly can't handle NO PUNCTUATION!  I need proper spelling!  I need emoji's!  I need exclamation points!  I need touchy-feely, ooshy-gushy, I'm-glad-you-are-my-friend messages!

(I apparently need affirmation.)

So, if you are reading this just know it's not you, it's me.  IT IS ME.  And then have mercy on this poor, extroverted mama who has not had enough GNO's lately and (for the love of Pete!) throw in a smiley!  Please!


SEE how much nicer that looks?

That is all.

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