Bad Sales Tactics

The other day I decided to bite the bullet and buy a new pair of Toms shoes to replace the green ones that had worn out.   (My big toe was coming out of the end!)  Katie and I were at a local mall and went into a shoe store that carried Toms.  After much deliberation and oohing and aahing I decided I wanted to forgo the polka dots, stripes, and flowers and get the navy blue canvas because "they will go with everything."  Which, in my world of few fashion risks, is true.
Enter cute 18 year old sales girl.  She asks what I size I wear and I told her "9."  As in nine, neuf, nueve, niner, etc.

She came out with two pair of eights and a seven and half.

Really?  Did I stutter?

"They run big," said she.

"Yes, but I have had two pair of Toms.  I wear a nine."

"Try them on because they will stretch."

I couldn't even get my heel in them.

"I wear a nine," I said sweetly through gritted teeth.  Katie was standing behind the girl, covering her mouth to stifle the snickers escaping from her against her will.  

"Do you want to try the 7 1/2?"

Did she really just ask me that?

"I couldn't even get my foot in the eight.  I need a nine."  You have just entered...the Twilight Zone.  Is she offended by the size of my foot?

Salesgirl bounces back to the storage room and comes back with 4, count 'em FOUR boxes.  For crying out loud.

"Do you want to try these?" she asks, whipping out a pair of red Taylor Swift Keds with white lace.

I was supposed to be trying on navy blue Toms.

I smiled with the love of Jesus and said, "They are really cute, but not for me."  Katie looked at me like "CAN I GET THEM?" and I was like "Heck no!"

Salesgirl then shows me a pair of sparkly Sperrys.  Are you freaking kidding me?  

I took a deep, calming breath.  "I just want to try on the navy ones."

She had in her hands a box with size nine written on it.  Lo and behold, the shoes fit!

I purchased the shoes, hoping these last longer than salesgirl's career and told her once again that, no, I don't want to try the white ones because I have FIVE KIDS and TWO DOGS for the third time and they would never stay clean for even an HOUR in my world.  I need navy blue, people.  I need colors that don't show dirt.  And NO I don't want the invisible socks because they aren't invisible and won't stay on my feet.

K?

K.